British painter Tom de Freston is challenging traditional notions of the male gaze through an intimate series of paintings featuring his wife, novelist Kiran Millwood Hargrave, during various stages of pregnancy. His first major exhibition, "Poíēsis," at London's Varvara Roza Galleries showcases these deeply personal works alongside paintings inspired by Titian's classical nude figures.
Speaking from his studio in a village outside Oxford, surrounded by nude portraits of Millwood Hargrave, de Freston explains his artistic mission: "The subject comes with huge baggage and I like that. I wanted to ask, What does it mean as a male artist to be looking at the female figure? And where does the agency sit?" The exhibition runs from November 30 to December 20, 2024.
De Freston draws significant inspiration from Titian's Poesie series, particularly examining how those paintings, commissioned by King Philip II of Spain, fetishized the naked female body. "Obviously there's other things going on in them – I think Titian's often prodding at morality and power," de Freston notes. He has incorporated some of Titian's figures into his own large-scale canvases, deliberately playing with concepts of the male gaze.
The pregnancy paintings carry profound personal significance, created as the couple endured seven pregnancy losses before the birth of their daughter, Coral, in 2023. Initially, these works were not intended for public exhibition but served as de Freston's private method of processing grief. "It was like the studio was my space to work through stuff that was beyond language, without burdening Kiran with it," he explains.
The artist describes his work as "an act of empathy," drawing particularly on the mythological story of Eurydice and Orpheus. This classical tale resonates with themes of "her unreachability, his need to look to her, questions about the distances between men and women and of course the feeling of being on the threshold of an underworld of grief and loss, hoping for a pregnancy resulting in a live birth."
Acknowledging the inherent challenges in his approach, de Freston admits: "You can't deny the male gaze in these works: it's there. You're trying to get to this figure, or to their unseen internal world. And even though you're intimately connected to them, you can't." He argues that this unreachability is central to the work's meaning.
Contrary to traditional artist-muse dynamics, de Freston emphasizes that Millwood Hargrave serves as an active collaborator rather than a passive subject. "Her voice is hugely present in the work," he states. Millwood Hargrave confirms this collaborative approach, explaining that "these aren't posed" but are based on photographs he took "in the domestic space throughout my pregnancies."
When asked about the public exposure of such intimate moments, Millwood Hargrave expresses enthusiasm rather than concern. "When he first talked to me about using these photographs, I was just excited, because this body of work is the most beautiful I've ever seen Tom create," she says. "They're not sexualized. They're worshipful and considered and you can feel the love in them."
De Freston notes that visual art rarely explores pregnancy and miscarriage with such depth. His paintings successfully capture "that mix of grief and hope" while documenting precious moments in time. Millwood Hargrave describes them as elegies, explaining: "I think any painting feels like an act of mourning anyway, because you're trying to capture something that is gone. We were so ecstatic and scared in this [last] pregnancy."
The arrival of baby Coral marked a transformative moment for de Freston both personally and artistically. "She took a breath, and it instantaneously felt like the whole world somehow unlocked," he recalls. Previously concerned about fatherhood's impact on his art, he instead experienced "a sudden shattering of the lie of the individual" and gained awareness of "the interconnectedness of everything."
This shift is reflected in his artistic evolution from what he admits was previously "very heavy" work to paintings filled with hope. The pregnancy series incorporates elements of magical thinking common to expectant parents, especially those who have experienced loss. De Freston views these works as "ritualistic, like spells. And in a kind of secular way, like prayers." The exhibition represents both an artistic achievement and a deeply personal journey through loss, hope, and ultimately, the transformative experience of parenthood.
